Stars unite to raise money to help Myleene Class fight the deadly mansion tax

Pride's Purge

(satire?)

Stars including One Direction, Emeli Sande, Rita Ora and Ed Sheeran have recorded a new version of the Band Aid charity single to raise money to help Myleene Class in her fight against the spread of the deadly mansion tax.

The recording of the reworked Do They Know It’s Christmas – which also included Ellie Goulding, Sam Smith, Chris Martin and Bono – comes exactly 30 years after the original Band Aid song was released to help eradicate the severe famine of attention which was being suffered by large numbers of 1980s pop stars at the time.

Victims of the deadly mansion tax – a disease which effects humans and other primates earning over several million a year – typically display symptoms such as intense whining and constant bouts of moaning, followed by copious vomiting of bullshit from several orifices.

And in the final stages of the mansion tax, sufferers afflicted by the disease often experience dangerously high blood…

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